January 21, 2009

ENJOY THIS ONE………….

During the Cold War, if USA launched a nuke-loaded missile, Soviet
Satellites would inform the Soviet army in 3 seconds and in less than 45
seconds Soviet counter-missiles would be on their way.

Recent studies commissioned by US department of Defense included one on
nuclear war between India and Pakistan :

This was the scenario.... ......... ...

The Pakistan army decides to launch a nuke-missile towards India. They
don't need any permission from their government, and promptly order the
countdowns.

Indian technology is highly advanced. In less than 8 ! seconds, Indian
army detects the Pak countdown and decides to launch a missile in
retribution.

But they need permission from the Government of India.

They submit their request to the Indian President. The President
forwards it to the Cabinet. The Prime Minister calls an emergency Lok
Sabha session.

The LS meets, but due to several walkouts and severe protests by the
opposition, it gets adjourned indefinitely.

The President asks for a quick decision.

In the mean time, the Pak missile failed to take off due to technical
failure. Their attempts for a re-launch are still on.

Just then the Indian ruling party is reduced to a minority because a
party that was givin! g outside support withdraws it. The President asks
the PM to prove his majority within a week.

As the ruling party fails to win the confidence vote, a caretaker
government is installed.

The caretaker PM decides to permit the armed forces to launch a nuclear
missile. But the Election Commission says that a caretaker government
cannot take such a decision because elections are at hand.

The Election Commission files Public Interest Litigation in the Supreme
Court alleging misuse of power.

The Supreme Court comes to the rescue of the PM, and says the acting!
PM is authorized to take this decision in view of the emergency facing
the nation.

Just then one of the Pak missiles successfully took off, but it fell
367 miles away from the target, on its own government building in
Islamabad at 11.00AM.

Fortunately there were no casualties as no employee had reached the
office that early. In any case, the nuclear core of the missile had
detached somewhere in flight.

The Pakistan army is now trying to get better technologies from China
and USA. The Indian Government, taking no chances, decides to launch a
nuclear missile of its own, after convening an all-party meeting. This
time all the parties agree.

Its three months since the army had sought permission. But as
preparations begin, "pro-humanity" ,

"anti-n! uclear" activists come out against the Government's decision.
Human chains are formed and Rasta rokos organized.

In California and Washington endless e-mails are sent to Indians
condemning the government and mentioning "Please forward it to as many
Indians as possible".

On the Pakistan side, the missiles kept malfunctioning. Some missiles
deviate from target due to technical failures or high-speed wind blowing
over Rajasthan.

Many of them land in the Indian Ocean killing some fishes.

A missile (smuggled from USA) is pressed into service. Since the
Pakistan army is unable to understand its software, it hits it original
destination: Russia.

Russians successfully intercepts the missile and in retaliation
launches a nuclear ! missile towards Islamabad. The missile hits the
target and creates havoc.

Pakistan cries for help. India expresses deep regrets for what has
happened and sends in a million dollars worth of Parle-G biscuits.

Thus India never gets to launch the missile

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